——

We’ve had a family tragedy. We lost a beloved member of our big family on Monday in a horrible car accident in the California desert. And I can’t sleep. For two days now. And I can’t stop with the worry about my mom as they were the best friends. They had just spent the entire weekend together.

ugh.

fuck.

Can’t talk about it anymore right now. Maybe later.

In all this sleeplessness I’ve been digging around doing just shit and this first roll of film from that nikon I had just processed surfaced. I feel like just throwing it up here. Nothing special. Just something to keep me busy.
I’ll try to make better images with the next roll. Maybe a little something more interesting. And I’ll try not to forget about it this time.

And I’m thankful for them all.

There are days I want to give up. On everything. I just get overly tired from burning it at both ends and I want to shut it all down. The blog, the site - everything. But then I’ll come across an image or better yet, like yesterday, receive an email out of the blue that just wakes me up and renews my inner most drive.

That “out of the blue” yesterday was the wake up I needed at just the right moment. It was a huge reminder to myself of why I carry my camera with me constantly.

Simply put, I love experiencing life and I love sharing it. And making pictures is the best way I know how to do that, especially if my friends are a part of it, however small a role they may feel they play. And sometimes, just when I might be thinking the same of myself, or how my everyday pictures just might not really matter, that it’s all in my head, someone writes me and says they exactly do matter. Because they remembered that one day I just happen to be there, in the right place, during the right moment, when someone smiled or not smiled in their own perfect way. It really doesn’t matter the gesture but more that I caught it and now I’m able to share it. And my heart just fuckin’ swells with happiness.

It’s all I needed. And I’m good again.

Because of that note to me and a longer conversation later, I’ve realized I don’t nearly show enough of the people I call my friends, or of strangers I meet who become friends. I was also told this. So I will, starting now. After all, this is life.

Meet Dana. Full of character and life, I’m always happy to run into her. It’d been a while since I last saw her and since that last time, she had some tat work done. We all gathered for a few minutes around a fire pit and huddled up close as she showed and told us all about them.

This is one of those moments I’ll always, for some reason, remember. Just because. But more reasoning would argue to the fact I was hanging out with friends from out of town and we all had a great night together, which, is true. I can go with that.

And just because.

Can’t wait for summer.

From my young days on the farm where we had barn mousers (Champagne was my favorite) to the present, they’ve always been a constant in my life.

Even now and even though I don’t cohabitate with one – we never really do own them, duh! – there is an orange tom who visits often. He usually wakes me at my back bedroom window and when I finally acknowledge him, he hollers back before running to the front door to greet me. He’ll come in, wander around checking each corner of the house before plopping down in the middle of my living room floor for either a quick nap or bath. Or both. it really depends on his mood. And probably what he’s been up to in the hours before arriving here. He’s also realized where the sardines are kept (from a failed experiment on myself-post coming on that soon) and will sometimes paw at the fridge door. He’s the only one who eats them and prefers the ones in oil to the mustard. Blech.

When I was in Turkey at this time last year I was wowed by all the cats there. In most doorways, alleys, rooftops and shops there are cats. And I watched as most everyone doted on them. In the corners of walkways and buildings I often spotted plates of scraps for these little guys and gals. I shot as much as I could but being on assignment much of it was on the go and I didn’t have time to really compose or get artsy with the images. And man, I’m slapping myself for passing up some of the cats I saw in the most awesome of settings. I just didn’t have the time.

Maybe I’ll just have to go back and shoot a cat essay of sorts. Serio!

On-the-go shots from the hip. No time to compose!

Seaside town of Antalya and right across from my hotel window. The guardian. We had a stare off. I lost.

More Antalya cats.

Acropolis

Museum cat

Celçuk shop cat and best friend. For a portrait of him and his human click HERE

One miscellaneous duck, er, goose. Or duck? Goose?

Sunbathing at Ephesus.

This fella kinda broke my heart. He was old, beat up and tired. He was struggling to chew the bits of dry bread left for him.

Cats will nap anywhere, including on top of museum artifacts we humans aren’t allowed to touch.

Surprisingly, most cats know they can’t enter buildings. This little guy just kept at my attention but never crossed the threshold.

City cat. Istanbul. Love this image and cat although I wish I wouldn’t have cropped off his rump. Reminds me of the tom that visits me.

During a break from assignment shooting I walked down to the docks of Antalya and ran into this young and pregnant soon-to-be mama cat. She was a definite fisher cat. Her territory pretty much ran the length of the docks and shores here. I watched as she dipped her paw down into cracks looking for smidges of food, although I could never quite tell what she was pulling out and nibbling on. I love how the rusty colored spots on her back matched that of the seawall.